By A. SCHARNHORST

D&ily News Reporter

Emery Emery says he was lucky not to have been a boy named Sue.

The Olathe resident has received a lot of kidding about his name, but he said things could have been worse - if his parents had given him a girl's name.

But Emery, 23, has used the jabs the moniker used to generate to find a new profession. Comedy.

He isn't well-known yet, but he plans to be. His name is memorable, and he is getting the exposure necessary to progress, he said.

Emery has been a professional comedian for almost two years. He has performed throughout the Midwest, and recently returned from a three-week stint in Los Angeles.

Emery credits his budding comedic talent on two things - his name and his mother's occupation.

Emery started his stage career under the guidance of his mother, a club singer. Occasionally he appeared on stage with her, singing while she played the piano. He believes one incident in particular may have sparked his career, be said.

Photos By Scott Smith

"One night, after I finished the song - I think it was Proud Mary - some people stood up, they applauded, and I said into the mike: 'Don't applaud, throw money.' I got a spanking for it. Looking back, that's probably when I decided I Could be a comic. Because they laughed."

Emery Emery was born that way - the son of a man also named Emery Emery.

"My father decided he didn't want to be alone in life. So he named me Emery Emery ... I think a lot of why I became a comic stems from my name. That's why I'm going to name my son Emery Emery Emery. A sense of humor is one of the most important things you can have. If you don't have eyes, a nose or a mouth, if you have a sense of humor you can get through life."

Through the years, the younger Emery developed several ways to cope with the teasing his name provoked.

"I learned martial arts at first. Before I developed a sense of humor, I beat them up ... I found it necessary to try to convince people of things that were true," he said.

One of those things was that his name was Emery Emery II. The other was that he was born On Christmas. Other students never knew whether to believe him.

One complication was that Emery rarely stayed in one School for very long - going to 12 schools in less than 12 years.

"I didn't get good grades. I got into fights with other kids .. as a result of that, I became well known," Emery said. "Comedy was a way to feed a need to be well known. "

He quit school by the time be reached high school. He took his GED as a junior, passed, and worked in several occupations before turning to comedy. He managed various restaurants and owned his own business.

He started performing locally in April 1985, at open mike nights at area clubs. Six months later, the management of Stanford and Son called and asked him to emcee a show.

The first night Emery went on stage, he handed a watermelon to a black man. The gag was successful because the man laughed at it himself, Emery said.

"The second night I did that, the guy I handed it to gave me the most horrendous look ... the second night I decided never to do comedy again."

But he did continue with his comedy, on the encouragement of friends. Kansas City is the ideal market for budding comedians, he said, and it has provided him ample opportunities to practice his new profession.

"This is the best place to start - it's easy here," Emery said. "There aren't so many comics, so you can rise faster."

"I'm a professional now, and I travel all over the country. In L.A., no one would even look at me there. But in Kansas City, on a Thursday night, if they you're a professional they'll give you some time."

But starting in Kansas City has also had its drawbacks, he said.

"It's too bad that people had to see me start here, because for the first six months, I simply wasn't funny ... You say I'm ready to headline, or I'm ready to middle, and they say, 'Hey pal, I remember when you were still putting a dildo on your head. Huh-uh."

Starting out hasn't been easy. Emery has yet to begin making a profit out of his comedy.

"Not yet. I will be, but not now I'm not," he said. "Thank goodness for relatives. "

Until he begins making a living from the enterprise, which be expects in about six months, he lives with his cousin. She has agreed to support him, even if things look bleak.

"The best part is the comfort of knowing if I can't come up with the rent money, it's OK. That's really what a young comic needs."

"You consider it your investment in you. You're a business and anyone who knows anything about small business knows it takes three years before you make any money."