There was a dog. He was like most other dogs in every way with only one single exception. This dog was gay. At least he thought he was gay. He had come to terms with his homosexuality. As a matter of fact he had become aware of his sexuality at a very early age.
He was only four weeks old when he began to notice that he was not like the other pups. He knew that in order to survive he must fight for position at the teat. Yet the idea of putting his mouth on that nipple repulsed him. So much so that he went on to become the runt of the litter. The other pups ridiculed and teased him.
Eventually he would discover he could lick himself. After this revelation he lost all interest in other activities. While his brothers and sisters were chasing crickets he could be found in a corner, or under the family car, cleaning his genitalia.
One day about three weeks before his second birthday, he was lying in the back yard just spending time with himself, and one of his many older cousins wandered up to him while he was... Well you know. The young pup was so embarrassed that he just got up and walked away. Just then the older dog stopped him and told the impressionable young pup that there was nothing to be ashamed of and that everyone did it. Then he showed the pup on himself how he liked to clean. The young pup was amazed at how well his older cousin performed this task and asked him how he got so good. The older dog began to explain but then stopped and said
"Well, I think it would be okay if I just show you." At first the pup thought this was all wrong but the elder explained that he had been tutored by a young human boy so it could not possibly be something they are not supposed to do. And besides, who better to teach the art of cleaning than someone with many years of experience such as himself? When the pup agreed the dog said,
"Now this will be our little secret." Then he began the grooming. At first the pup was very nervous. But after a few moments he was able to relax. As a matter of fact he began to rather enjoy having someone else clean him, rather than clean himself, as he had done so many times before. Yes this cleaning was quite different indeed. He was feeling a strange, unusual, feeling. A sort of tingle. A buzz. Yes this was most definitely a,... A buzz
When the dog was finished cleaning him he realized that he had come clean quite quickly. He thought he could not think of a time in his whole life when he had become so clean in such a short amount of time. Nor had he ever felt so satisfied after a cleaning. Not even when his mom cleaned him had he enjoyed it so much. Though that, he thought, was a close second.
As he was lying there afterward the dog began to do an odd thing. He was moving in a funny way. As if he wanted the pup to see something. The pup did not know what the dog was doing right off. But then it hit him. He was trying to allow the pup to notice that he too needed a cleaning. As a matter of fact, once the pup noticed him it was quite clear that the dog not only needed to be cleaned, he was ready and excited about the idea. The pup did not understand this at all. For just a second ago the dog had said he was better at giving a cleaning because of his age and experience. So why would he want a pup of almost no experience whatsoever cleaning him? Well he asked the dog this and the dog explained that the pup needed some practice in order to perfect the new skills that he had just been taught. The pup did not see the logic in that at all, as he was arguing his point the dog became aggravated and aggressive. While the pup was in mid sentence he grabbed the pup by the throat and forced the pup to clean him. The dog was much larger than the pup, so resistance was futile, and the pup knew this. He therefore submitted and completed the cleaning.
When it was all over he felt dirty and he cowered into his favorite hiding place. Beneath the family car. He stayed there the whole of the night and most of the morning. He could not sleep so he spent most of the night cleaning himself repeatedly. Finally, as the sun began to rise, he felt tired and he fell into a very deep sleep. So deep that he never heard the roar of the engine that morning. His head exploded with such a thud that the driver thought he had blown a tire. The pup was dead.
